Ashley

Ashley graduated high school when she was 17 years old and found herself pregnant when she was 18. She was very nervous upon finding out about her pregnancy in March 2011 but her boyfriend was really supportive. Her parents were also supportive, though not happy. Unfortunately her boyfriend’s family was not supportive. They were not involved in the pregnancy whatsoever. But Ashley didn’t mind. She had all that she needed.

At 24 weeks she found out that she was having a girl. Together she and her boyfriend decided on the name Aubree Jordana. Her boyfriend wanted to join the air force and they decided they wanted to get married. So, they did. They got married before he left for boot camp in September 2011. Shortly after he left Ashley started getting really bad headaches. When she went to her doctor they discovered that her blood pressure was really high. She had to be hospitalized and ended up not being able to attend her sister’s wedding.

Ashley was diagnosed with preeclampsia and given betamethasone shots to speed up the development of Aubree’s lungs. She was put on bed rest. She remained on bed rest for seven weeks before she woke up one morning feeling ill and suffering from a bad headache. Ashley called her doctor and she was told to go to the hospital. Upon arrival Ashley was induced and her daughter was born at 8:39 am on October 30, 2011. Luckily this was a Sunday and subsequently the only day that Aubree’s dad was allowed to call home from boot camp so Ashley was able to tell him that their daughter was born. Aubree Jordana was born at just 35 weeks and had to have an IV to receive fluids as she had trouble sucking. She also had trouble breathing and thus had to be kept in the “level 2” nursery for a couple of days.

It was so hard for Ashley to see her newborn baby hooked up to so many machines and monitors, but she knew that this was only helping. After they went home Aubree did really well. The only thing Ashley struggled with was finding the right formula for baby Aubree. Then, two weeks after the birth, Ashley started to have a lot of bleeding that never stopped or slowed down. She became concerned and called her doctor. She had to return to the hospital and get surgery done. It turns out part of the placenta was left in her uterus after the birth, and this is what was causing the bleeding. The piece of remaining placenta was removed and Ashley had to remain at the hospital for a few days. It was so hard for her to be away from baby Aubree even for that short period of time, but she got through it.

Aubree, Ashley, and Ashley’s husband are all currently doing well. Ashley is taking college classes and her husband is still in the air force. It was especially hard for her to be apart from him when he was away at training because he wasn’t able to meet his daughter for the first time until she was two months old, but they make it work. Ashley loves being an army wife and she loves her family so very much.

Lexi

Lexi got pregnant one year after she was given an ounce of freedom in her life. Her and her boyfriend had only been in a very rocky four month relationship when she got pregnant. The morning after Lexi found out she was pregnant her mother called her and told her of the dream she had the night before wherein a baby told her that Lexi was pregnant. With a sigh of relief her mother begged her not to get knocked up anytime soon. Needless to say Lexi did not tell her mom about the pregnancy for a long while. Lexi was 18 at the time so luckily she had graduated high school three months prior to getting pregnant, and she had a steady job at a call center that paid well.

Her pregnancy was beautiful; she didn’t have any nausea, morning sickness, Braxton hicks contractions, anything. She was a happy girl! Her boyfriend however was not there for her physically or emotionally like he should have been. He had also walked out of every job he’d ever gotten, never keeping one long enough to help out with any pregnancy expenses. Finally on the day their son was born, he got a part time job. It was very part time but a job nonetheless.

Lexi’s boyfriend went to the hospital with her when she was being induced, but he left to go to dinner with his family as she was starting active labor. He didn’t return until she was vomiting as a side effect of her epidural and next thing she knew she was pushing. He had made it just in time for the birth of his son. Baby Jace was born on May 6 weighing 7 pounds 13 ounces. He was magnificent. The way he looked into Lexi’s eyes changed her life forever. She knew in that moment that she had become who she was born to be, Jace’s mother. There was nothing more she could ever want to be.

Her boyfriend didn’t help at all the first night with Jace, and didn’t stay with them the second night either. However the day Lexi got to take Jace home was perfect. It was Mother’s Day. She and Jace had a miraculous first week together, so she hardly noticed that her boyfriend hadn’t shown up once. He however didn’t forget to yell at her when she didn’t respond to his text messages quick enough. He thought that it was a breeze for Lexi to be a single parent.

Eventually he started coming around once or twice a week, but instead of helping out with his son he would always ask why Lexi couldn’t feed Jace or why she couldn’t just change his diaper. Apparently seeing Lexi eating wasn’t a good enough reason for him to help out. Luckily Lexi had grown accustomed to taking care of her son without any help from his father. She just thanks God that she had her mother to help. Her mother was a perfect Mimi to Jace; Lexi would have been lost without her guidance.

Lexi loves Jace more than anything in her life but deep down she had always felt like she was never good enough for him. It was possible that she had taken some corrective criticism from her mom the wrong way, but she always felt like people didn’t see her as a good mother because she was too young.  Her doctor and family would even tell her that she was a good mother yet she herself could never grasp the idea as being true. She felt guilty and selfish for wanting to take anytime for herself, or for being away from Jace for a few minutes. She even felt guilty for falling asleep at night, even though Jace was safe in his crib. She finally learned that she had been suffering from post-partum depression. At first she didn’t want to accept it because she never once thought about hurting her baby or neglecting him, and she thought this is what postpartum depression was all about. She didn’t want people to think she wasn’t a fit mother due to what she was suffering from. It made her feel completely worthless.

Lexi eventually got over her depression with the help of her doctor and especially the guidance from her mother. Her boyfriend did not help out her stress level though. Things were always up and down with him. Aside from getting him to see Jace, the most difficult thing was getting him to pay child support. He made her write out a list of everything Jace needed for a month along with their prices in order to justify him giving her the amount she asked for. He accused her of being a liar on numerous occasions. Financially, it is very hard being a young parent.

As of last time I spoke with Lexi, Jace’s father was three months behind on child support. This was rough for Lexi because she was hoping to make Jace’s Christmas bountiful and she was struggling without the help from his dad. Jace was growing very bored with his current assortment of toys so Lexi had to get creative. She frequently finds herself dancing and singing silly songs all day long to entertain Jace. She has no complaint there, of course.

She and Jace currently have their own place. At first it was very difficult for Lexi not having him sleep in the same room as she did, but it helped him sleep through the night for the most part. The two of them are a better family than she could have ever dreamed of. She prefers his company much more than her ex-boyfriends. Watching Jace learn is so rewarding, Lexi gets so excited for his life. He has always been developmentally advanced (holding his head up perfectly at birth, standing at six months) she always tearfully says that it will just be tomorrow that he is driving and wanting to date.

Here are some words of wisdom from Lexi: “Being a teen mom was the best thing for me, my son saved my life. I don't think any teen should try to get pregnant on purpose; you all have your whole life to become a mother. Enjoy your freedom and learn about yourself before you're no longer a priority. Also, a big message I'd like to send out is that girls really need to think about who they are having sex with. Think, "It's possible this guy could be the father of my child." Because it's not just sex. Take a good look at the person you're giving yourself to, because if you do get pregnant, your child deserves the very best father. You can't force someone to be the daddy your future child will need. Be selective, and never settle.”

Martha

Martha was engaged to her high school sweetheart, James, at the age of 16. A few months after their engagement Martha and James found out they were pregnant, so they got married immediately. They felt they were perfectly ready for their lives together as a married couple, and parents. But nothing could have prepared them for what happened to their son. At just 30 weeks pregnant Martha was diagnosed with pre-eclampsia, so she had to go in for a non-stress test every week to make sure her baby was growing healthily. At 37 weeks she went in for her weekly test and after being on the machine for three hours the doctor told her to get her stuff packed because she was being induced in one hour. She was scared but excited.

When Martha and her husband arrived at the hospital they were taken to a room and explained that Martha was being induced because the baby was showing signs of being stressed; and pre-eclampsia increases the risk of the mother and/or child having seizures which could possibly lead to death. Martha and James were terrified and hoped that everything would be okay with their son. Martha had her Pitocin started that day.

After two days of unsuccessfully trying to jump-start labor Martha had to have an emergency C-section done. They took her back to the OR at 8 am and by 8:45 am Dustyn was born. He was not healthy at all. Martha didn’t hear him cry, and the doctor never showed him to her. They ran out of the room with him immediately and James followed. Martha had to be in the recovery room for 45 minutes and all she could do was wonder what was wrong and if Dustyn was going to be okay. As she was being wheeled back to her room she expected everyone to be in there looking in awe at her newborn son. But instead everyone was standing in the hallway with red, puffy eyes. Instantly Martha’s heart sank.

Finally James came into the room and told her that something was wrong with Dustyn and his pediatrician had something to tell Martha. She couldn’t stand not knowing what was happening. Was her baby okay? Was he still alive? Where was he? Why couldn’t she see him? She needed answers immediately. The doctor came in at that moment and told her that Dustyn was having difficulty breathing and they didn’t have the technology to take care of him there so he was being Mediflighted out 2 ½ hours away, and Martha had to stay at this hospital to recover.

Martha insisted that she get discharged the next day. As soon as she was discharged she began the long trip to OKC (where Dustyn was.) When she finally got there they told her what she had been dreading since the morning before: her son wasn’t going to make it. At this point all she could do was scream and cry and ask God why he was doing this to her. Why had she just been given this beautiful gift of a son and already he was being taken away from her? She knew that she would do whatever it took to make Dustyn better.

The hospital had Dustyn on an ECMO machine which works as the mother’s body would to support him. Baby Dustyn had two holes in his lungs and three holes in his heart. He couldn’t breathe because of the holes in his lungs. His heart valve didn’t close when he was born so his body was still relying on his mother’s to support him. On top of that he had too much CO2 in his blood.

All Martha could do was pray, cry, and sit with her newborn baby in the NICU. She stayed with him for five days and hoped for the best. Her prayers ended up paying off. On the fifth day, to the doctor’s surprise, Dustyn’s holes in his heart AND lungs were almost completely closed. He was recovering beautifully. Dustyn still couldn’t breathe on his own so he had to be on a ventilator. But he was able to get off of the ventilator on Mother’s day. This was the greatest first Mother’s Day gift that Martha could have ever asked for. He was able to go home one month after he was born! Martha and James were stunned and thrilled, they had been told their son was not going to make it and here he was coming home with them! They knew they had been blessed. They had a long, hard struggle but in the end it all paid off. They now have a healthy happy three year old little boy.

Lexi

Lexi had to drop out of high school her senior year because she was suffering from thyroid disease and needed surgery. Her boyfriend at the time was by her side through her surgery and recovery. They were inseparable, and one month later they found out the consequences. Lexi was feeling off, she was overly exhausted and very nauseous. At first she thought that maybe these were side effects of her surgery. But eventually she decided that she should take a pregnancy test just to be safe. Her boyfriend picked up two pregnancy tests for her. He waited in her bedroom while she took the first test. Lexi wasn’t surprised to see the two pink lines show up but her boyfriend didn’t believe it. He made her take the second one, and sure enough she was pregnant.

Lexi realized that she was only 17 years old and she was going to have a baby. Instantly she knew she wouldn’t be considering adoption or abortion, and her boyfriend agreed that no matter what he would be by her side. But shortly thereafter his demeanor began changing. She made her first doctor’s appointment and told her family. But the day they were going to tell his family his personality changed. He went over to her house after work and he was acting very strange. Finally Lexi asked him what was up and he told her that if she didn’t get an abortion then he was going to leave her. She told him she wouldn’t so he kept his word and he left.

Lexi still didn’t consider abortion or adoption after he left. It was for this reason that his family constantly harassed her, but she never let it affect her. When word got out at her old high school that she was pregnant she lost pretty much all support she had for her pregnancy. Her family were the only ones she could count on. But they were all she needed.

Just one month after Lexi’s 18^th birthday she gave birth to her beautiful son. Camden was born on July 27, 2011 at 9:47 am with Lexi’s mom and sister in the room. He weighed 7 pounds 2 ounces. His father has never seen him. He hasn’t contacted Lexi since the day he left her house. Lexi earned her GED and is planning on going to school to become a certified nurse midwife.

Lexi felt it was important to share her story because most girls think that if they get pregnant they will force their boyfriend to stay with them forever. She wants girls to see that there is not always a “perfect ending.” In fact, for the most part, teen dads don’t stick around.

This is cute baby Camden when he was four months old!

Jonna

Jonna had just come out of a two-year relationship when she had a one night stand with her neighbor. This was the night she conceived. When she found out she was pregnant she was beyond scared, she gathered up a group of her friends to help her tell her parents so that they wouldn’t be so hard on her. They approached her mom first and she was mad but took it better than Jonna had expected. Then it was time to tell her dad. Jonna had one of her friends go tell him first and then he called her into the living room alone and asked her if it was true. Jonna said yes and he was infuriated. He proceeded to call her a “whore” and told her that she would never become anything in life so she should just give up now. He was also adamant about the fact that she should give the baby up for adoption.

Jonna thought about adoption a lot but in the end she decided to do everything in her power to make sure that she would be there for her baby no matter what. She was heartbroken about her dad’s reaction, so much so that they fought constantly. Eventually Jonna decided that her living arrangements were too stressful for her pregnancy so she decided to move out. Her father was FURIOUS. He threw her clothes in her face and told her to never show her face again. He also said he would NEVER love her baby.

Jonna moved in with her baby’s father who didn’t live too far from her own home. Their relationship ended up flourishing and they got married. On February 20, 2007 her son Robert was born. He weighed seven pounds nine ounces and was perfect. Needless to say her dad ended up falling in love at first sight. He was so proud of Jonna for the decisions she ended up making and he apologized for the way he acted and told her it was because he was just so scared for her and he didn’t know how to express it. Jonna felt so accomplished. Her life felt complete.

Jonna and her husband have now been married for six years and couldn’t be happier. Jonna now has four kids at the age of 22. She knows it’s a lot for her age but she thinks she was made to be a mother and she wouldn’t have it any other way. She loves children and is honored to have her life taken up by her four little wonders. She would like everyone to know that four is her limit though because she had her tubes tied after the birth of her fourth.

Thanks for sharing Jonna!